i’m glad we have our priorities set
When butter is too hard to spread and it does the thing
‘Cause people seem to only post the 20-something Audrey Hepburn.
Audrey Hepburn was the granddaughter of a baron, the daughter of a nazi sympathizer, spent her teens doing ballet to secretly raise money for the dutch resistance against the nazis, and spent her post-film career as a goodwill ambassador of UNICEF, winning the presidential medal of freedom for her efforts.
…and history remembers her as pretty.
I think the hardest thing about finding a new doctor is finding a british actor who hasn’t already been on doctor who.
|Guy 1:||no, niggah, gay bros can raise babies. Look at that warthog motherfucker and that ferret thing that raised Simba. And that niggah became king of motherfucking Africa.|
WELCOME TO CANADA WHERE WE LITERALLY PUT UP WARNING SIGNS FOR NESTING CANADIAN GEESE
BECAUSE LET ME TELL U ABOUT THESE FRICKERS
FIRST OF ALL THEY HAVE FUCKIN TEETH
ON THEIR TONGUES
DO YOU WANNA GO NEAR ONE? “AWW IT’S JUST A LITTLE GOOSE YOU SAY”
THESE FRICKERS WILL CHARGE YOUR ASS IF THERE IS A NEST OR NEWLY HATCHED GOSLINGS AROUND
THIS IS THE STRUT OF A GOOSE WARNING YOU THAT IT’S ABOUT TO KILL YOUR ASS
ONCE THEY DO THIS?
YOU RUN FAST AND YOU RUN FAR BECAUSE ONE OF THE PARENTS WILL FLY UP TO YOUR PUNY HUMAN FLESHBAG AND KARATE CHOP YOUR GODDAMNED NECK AND TRY TO BITE ANYTHING WITHIN REACH OK?
WHILE THE OTHER PARENT, CONSUMED WITH BLOODLUST AND THE BURNING VENGEANCE OF A SPECIES HAVING NEARLY BEEN EXTINCT AND BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE GOES AND LITERALLY TRIES TO BITE YOUR ACHILLES TENDON IN HALF. WITHOUT FAIL THESE HELLSPAWN WILL ALWAYS GO FOR THERE. DON’T KNOW WHERE THAT IS?
CONGRATULATIONS YOU NO LONGER CAN WALK OR RUN AND REQUIRE EXTENSIVE SURGERY BECAUSE OF A FUCKING GOOSE. I ASSUME THEY EAT YOU ALIVE FROM HERE OUT. THEY’RE THAT FUCKIN CRAZY.
CANADIAN GEESE ARE TERRIFYING AND THE SOURCE OF ALL CANADIAN STRIFE IN THE HISTORY OF FOREVER. I’M CANADIAN. TRUST ME. I KNOW.
THIS IS THE BRAVEST PERSON IN THE COUNTRY.
How dare a woman use a relevant anatomically correct term in a debate about abortion!
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